I was privileged to know Marian for 35 years as both a family member and a friend. She met me with openness and friendliness. Marian sought connection, and loved it that I held the same position in my family as she held in hers. We were both the youngest child in our families with the oldest being a brother and the middle child being a sister. She was a great listener and genuinely interested in my thoughts and experiences.
Marian was eager to know my family and was so kind and attentive to my mother Bernice and happy to meet my brother Joe and his dog Winnie. She had a natural affinity with older people and people who were ill. Her kindness and compassion made her a great caregiver
Over the years Marian had many experiences, ups and downs— travel, graduate school, jobs, relationships gained and lost. I appreciated her spirituality and her very special way of honoring important occasions. Her attention encouraged us to pause and appreciate the significance. Although there were dark times, when I think of Marian I think of how she could light up a room with her quiet joy.
I know the past few years of illness were challenging to Marian. She must have endured fear, sorrow, anger and great physical pain and discomfort. But her courage and equanimity shone through. Most of us don’t know how to behave, what to do or say when a person is so ill. Marian made it easy— ignored and forgave our awkwardness, appreciated our attention, expressed an interest in us, and maintained a sense of humor. She exhibited what seemed to me a perfect balance of realism about her prospects while still optimistically pursuing treatments available to her and not giving up. I was so impressed that during this difficult time for her she formed the Silent Contemplation group at her church, wanting to share the gift of meditation with others.
Marian was effusive! I am inclined to be reserved and at times felt ill prepared for her unrestrained manner. But over the years I came to cherish her heartfelt warmth and at times even reciprocate. I will hold dear her expressive love and draw on it in the years to come, and I will miss her terribly.
Donalda Speight